Business Coaching - How to Set a Boundary
Setting boundaries within your business
Let's talk about boundaries for a moment. It might sound like a big scary thing to set one, but boundaries don't have to be complicated.
What is a boundary?
A boundary is simply a rule for where/when/how/to whom you give your attention, and they come in all shapes and sizes. Without boundaries, things can feel chaotic and overwhelming, and those feelings trickle into all areas of our lives, especially if there are no limits set within our business and work-lives.
Here's the really great news about boundaries: You get to make the rules! So take a moment and check yourself.. are you feeling chaos and overwhelm? Would setting a new limit or rule in a certain area of your business or life help change things?
You have all kinds of relationships and places to give your attention in your life... with clients, family, friends, spouse/partner, kids, time, personal space, and last but not least, your SELF. Setting a boundary is setting an expectation of how you want to be treated within those relationships.
Here's a short little list of examples of types of boundaries to set
Office hours, so clients don't contact you at all hours of the night expecting an immediate response
Clear limits on services, so clients and vendors don't undervalue your time and expertise
Rules for privacy, so kids don't come barging in the bathroom while you pee
Physical work & home separation, so you aren't tempted to work during rest time
Open communication, so your friends and family know your emotional limits
Looking at this list, we can see that boundaries really have a lot to do with where we give our attention. Whatever has our attention also influences our emotions, thoughts, decision making, and how we spend our time.
Why is setting a boundary around where we give our attention so hard?
One huge thing in our lives making it difficult to set a boundary is technology. I don't know about you, but my phone is barely more than 3 feet away from me at any given moment of the day or night. And on my cell phone there are apps where someone can directly contact me, whether through email, DM, text, or messages, each one of which provides a notification to alert me the moment I’ve received a message… and naturally, I feel compelled to check it. What this means is, 24 hours a day 7 days a week 365 days a year, any random person on the planet can steal my attention at any time of day or night by making a notification pop-up within 3 feet of me.
No wonder it’s hard to set a boundary with our attention! We have become so conditioned to accepting notifications, especially since most of the time, notifications aren't from random people, but rather clients are relatives or friends or people who are actually in our lives. But, just because someone has access to us 24/7, doesn't mean that we have to give our attention to a response, especially if it’s during a time when we need to disconnect and rest.
Fear and Guilt around setting a boundary
Do you feel fear or guilt around setting a boundary? Fear of judgment or rejection, or a feeling of guilt for claiming something for yourself? Because we are so deeply and emotionally invested into our business, we tend to approach boundary setting with emotions -such as those of fear and guilt. With those emotions clouding our judgement, it can be really difficult to have clarity on what boundaries to set and how to set them. So if you’re struggling with setting a boundary take a moment and ask yourself- if I remove fear and guilt, would it be easier to just say no?
Struggle with boundaries?
If you struggle with setting a boundary, or saying no to clients, grab my Business Boundary Compass and learn how to say no clients without feeling like an ass. I'll walk you through it step-by-step, and literally this formula could just about be applied to any situation, not just with clients but friends, family, kids, co-workers, anybody that needs to hear the words no, and you need help feeling confident saying no.
Learn how to say no- get my exact formula!
I want to encourage you to evaluate when & how you give your attention to different people, and consider a boundary that you can set. If you want to learn how to say no using a formula, grab my PDF guide and get started setting boundaries today!
